a tale of two giving trees

 

I know a lot of people love The Giving Tree, and I think I mostly understand that love – the idea of giving everything up for someone else is a pretty powerful thing. Although I grew up with The Giving Tree as a kid, I take a very different point of view on it – the tree gets taken advantage of after a lifetime as a fucking doormat for a greedy jerk, and the boy who grows into an old man takes a whole lifetime to realize that things don’t buy you happiness, friends do (or in this case, essentially sitting on your friend’s face). Yeesh, how depressing. Thanks, but no thanks.

 

Verdict: not fuckable